The Outer Space Tour

Radiohead › Creep (4:20)

When you were here before
Couldnt look you in the eye
Youre just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
And I wish I was special
Youre so fuckin special

But Im a creep, Im a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.

I dont care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When Im not around
Youre so fuckin special
I wish I was special

But Im a creep, Im a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.

Shes running out again,
Shes running out
Shes run run run running out…

Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
Youre so fuckin special
I wish I was special…

But Im a creep, Im a weirdo,
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.
I dont belong here.

Has this really improved? Friendster and company don’t really do enough to better accomodate the bloggers who yearn for a place on the internet where they can find their deepest thoughts, left unspoken.  It’s not that I have the urge but more like the passion.. passion left unattended to due to lack of convenience… this is nothing close to divine intervention, my blasphamy is beating the hell out me.  I’m losing fear and that is the scary part.  I’m not one to be taken lightly, I’m heavy like the machinery that raise buildings.  I’m just looking for a place to set my heavy thoughts down.. So yeah I’m just looking.  I’ll let you know when I find it though.  Promise.

www.setupthesystem.blogspot.com

u p d a t e d    a n d    u p g r a d e d

I’m leaving this god forsaken blog.  For one it’s not very user friendly and I can’t really do much with it.  I need something less complicated, but umm… hmm… I’ll blog here for a little bit right now since it has been a while and all…      

I’m a busy bee working hard for the colony. I have so many responsibilities that add up to equal a whole lot of stress but luckily I have someone that relieves me from all of the complications that accompany all of the necessary tasks I have to accomplish. 

It’s nice having a girlfriend that doesn’t go to the same school as you.  It saves you a lot of trouble because there are so many people that love to talk and even more people who love to listen.  I just love to love.  This time is different.  She’s different and I’m different.  Leaie is the love I never thought existed.  She’s absolutely perfect for me.  I never thought I would ever be with someone so amazing, you wouldn’t believe me even if I told you, so I will just keep to myself and give you a nothing more than a little smirk.  I don’t have anything to prove to anyone but myself.  I run around with a slight resemblance of the energizer bunny these days. I’m all over the place. Inspiration can take you a long way as long as it’s coming from a good source.  And yes by the way I am being secretive.  It’s quite obvious I don’t trust you.  Who are you anyway? Never mind this is getting stupider by the second so I’m going to end it here for good. Until Friendster decides to do something significant with their blog services I’m out… Look at me go with my unstructured paragraphs and run on sentences.. and I consider myself a writer.. pshhh.. save your criticism for now.  This is nothing. I’m too happy to actually try. You know what I mean? It’s kind of hard to get me sometimes. Take that from someone who knows that feeling a little all too well.  I’ll save the details for my autobiography. 

Sonnet #1 – “Jessne Mae’s Portrait”

By: Joseand Jay J. Cabillo

Just the slightest stare from your naked eyes

Transmits me to another galaxy

Your celestial body and scarlet skies

Embrace the elements of true beauty

The unspoken words your dear lips conceal

Would define love in all of its glory

Only if ever you were to reveal

The universe would act accordingly

Your sharp mind orbits around your dull heart

As evidence of equilibrium

Your skin bare the pigments of modern art

Mona Lisa of this millennium

Seven hundred and thirty five minutes

You’re a masterpiece I left unfinished

I am one who doesn’t believe in superstition, or at least one who tries really hard not to.  Horoscopes on the other hand are sometimes too irresistible to ignore.  I remember I was drunk at a house party one night when I was around the delinquent age of 16 and I was having a blast with these two strange ladies whom I’ve never met in my whole life and who were much older than I was.  I don’t remember any of their names; I just remember one having curly red hair and a moment where they asked me when my birthday is, so I told them, October 6.  I couldn’t believe how they reacted upon finding out that I am a Libra.  If I remember correctly, the exact words that came out of their mouths simultaneously were “You’re a Libra too! I knew it!” After that they rejoiced and gave me a really big hug and so that’s kind of when I started to believe in horoscopes.  So this is what Friendster’s horoscope feature had to say about Libras today. 

The Bottom Line

Why are you so preoccupied with looking back at your past? Turn and face front.

In Detail

Why are you so preoccupied with looking back at your past, when your future holds so much promise?! There you are, wasting your time wondering whatever happened to that lost love — while a potential new love is practically right in front of you, flapping their arms wildly in an attempt to get your attention! Turn and face front. Look at where you are going, not where you have been. The view is a lot more pleasant, and the possibilities are much more exciting!

I find it quite relevant considering the tear-jerking decision I hopelessly had to make in the last 24 hours.  Anyways, I have bigger things to bitch about than my so called love life that is, as of now, non-existent.  It’s probably for the best anyways since I did happen to take up a couple of time consuming and energy draining responsibilities on top of my overloaded schedule.  I actually uninstalled all three of my beloved online computer games (counter-strike, starcraft, & fritz grandmaster challenge) because I tend to procrastinate on my studies due to lack of self control, which is a crying shame on my part.  It’s time to get down to business and concentrate every ounce of energy I have into productivity.  I figure an extra amount of effort now will develop my attitude as a worker which in turn will benefit me in the long haul.

As of lately:

I watched Transformers today and it was the best movie I have seen in my entire life.  I will definitely write a review about it tomorrow for the school paper.  I would do it now but I have to study for a pharmacology quiz.

Witwicky family motto: "No sacrifice, no victory!"

Optimus Prime: Freedom is the right of all sentient beings

To the gossip folks: I’m over it so why aren’t you?

I’m not a dumb bum so don’t give me your sympathetic bullshit.  I don’t need it.  I don’t want to hear about this and that anymore, I don’t want you asking me why I do what I do, and seriously, fuck what you heard.  So how’s that for a change?

So all and all, this past week was pretty laid back.  The assessment return demonstrations weren’t as complicated as they probably should have been thanks to our lovely clinical instructor who is very companionate towards her students.  So that sure was a relief.

Oh yeah and by the way, the RC sim card is a worthless piece of shit so don’t buy it. It’s not worth going through the trouble of changing your contact number.  When my sim card completely loses signal, it doesn’t come back automatically like it should.  I have to restart my cellphone in order for me to get my signal back just for it to do the same thing over and over again.  I’m definitely going to take some affirmative action tomorrow about this predicament.

The rest is history.

-Jake

Kindly disregard the previous blogs prior to this one.  I have a new mindset now.. well actually more like revived or refurbished mindset that isn’t concerned with everyday teenage dilemmas.  I’m 21 and I really need to start acting my age.  It bothers me knowing that sometimes i tend to fall out of place and sink down to a level that I should’ve outgrown along time ago.  Gossip is gay. I’m not even going into details because thats where everything starts to go wrong.  Sometimes I subconciously give too much information to other people or even worst to the the wrong people who don’t really need to know.  So what I’m doing now is shutting the fuck up.  What’s mine is mine, what’s yours is yours, what’s ours is ours, and they can have whatever the fuck it is that they have.  Lets just leave it at that.  I’m not in fucking high school anymore (thank God), I could care less and well.. thats exactly what I’m going to do.  Just leave me the fuck alone and mind your own god damn business because I have my own problems to worry about and well my friend, im guessing so do you.  Let’s not make it more complicated than it already is.  We got work to do buddy.  My third year of college is comming right up and from what I’ve been told it’s the hardest year out of all four of them and so I really gotta get my shit together because I’m not planning on failing.  I’m putting my so called love life on hold and I’m just going to enjoy the ride, the ups and downs, the ins and outs, all that good shit. 

I finally finished enrolling yesterday which is a relief because I was so anxious to know what section I will be placed in. I didn’t get what I wanted despite my valiant effort but maybe, just maybe, I got what I needed;  a new beginning.  Oh how I love those.  I love the feeling of not knowing what to expect because usually, expectations lead to disappointments.

I can take it from here now. Thank you to everyone who helped me out along the way (you know who you are) during the times where I continually kept on misleading myself and forgetting to take the more important things into consideration.  I’m getting the bigger picture back into focus and I’m not going to be threatened or discouraged by the attention wrongfully placed on me.  I’m taking a bow and stepping out of the spot light.  The show is over.  Welcome back to the real world.

Here’s your encore.

Sometimes, Love is just an illusion that we paint in our twisted little heads with all sorts of bright blinding colors that steal our attention and in turn keep us from seeing the more important details.  The colors clash and cause an effect that takes away the beauty that is in black and white.

-Joseand Jay J. Cabillo

"Someday" - The Strokes

In many ways they’ll miss the good old days
Someday, someday
Yeah it hurts to say but I want you to stay
Sometimes, sometimes
When we was young oh man did we have fun
Always, always
Promises they break before they’re made
Sometimes, sometimes

Oh, my ex says im lacking in depth
I will do my best
You say you wanna stay by my side
Darling your head’s not right
I see alone we stand together we fall apart
Yeah, I think I’ll be alright
I’m working so I won’t have to try so hard
Tables they turn sometimes.
Oh someday.
I ain’t wasting no more time.

Trying, trying.

And now my fears, they come to me in threes
So I, sometimes
afraid my friend, you say the strangest things
I find, sometimes

Oh, My ex says i’m lacking in depth
Say I will try my best
You say you wanna stay by my side
Darling your head’s not right
I see alone we stand together we fall apart
Yeah, I think I’ll be alright
I’m working so I won’t have to try so hard
Tables they turn sometimes.
Oh someday

I ain’t wasting no more time

Oh my ex says that I’m lacking in depth, oh I will do my best. Time will reveal who we really are and what we really need. That and everything else.  It’s not what happened that we should think about.. It’s why it happened that should be on our mind.  I’ve learned a lot recently.. a lot about myself.  I’m not weak.. physically maybe, but i’m working on that.. mentally i’m focused and I’m smart enough to think for myself.. I can speak my mind when it needs to be heard.  I don’t hesitate to make a change when changes have to be made.  Emotionally I am stable.  I know how to make myself feel better and I am capable of being happy whether I am in a relationship or not.  I do not need anyone to define me. I am not in the encyclopedia nor the dictionary.  I shouldn’t be labeled with stereotypes because I am not based on an assumption.  I may not know what I want all the time but at least I know what I don’t want 99% of the time.  I’ve realized a lot about a lot of things and I am stronger now than I have ever been.  Darling your head’s not right. I see alone we stand and together we fall part, yeah, i think i’ll be alright.

<333

5617 4011 1236774 12360 7415?

yeah thats what i thought…

4011 46113177 907 6 57113 00 4011?

yeah thats what i thought…

4779://111111111.053.8312153734.3011/~83170/173969312.471777

well i just thought you would like to know… =]

<73

<33

<53

Its been a long week but it was very rewarding.  I may have not gotten what I wanted but I did get what I needed.  Freedom.  I was surprised how well my aunt has understood and trusted me recently.  I am an adventurist, I am not afraid to get hurt, jump off of things, and I can take care of myself when I must and I think my aunt knows that.  She actually let me out of my cage so to speak this past week and hopefully through out the rest of summer.  Yesterday was exactly what I was hoping for. Mambukal with fun people (Mayflor, Cherry Mae, Lowell, Albert, Jo Ann, Rafel, Armando, France) doing what fun people do best which is of course, have fun.  The 6th falls is my favorite place to go swimming in the whole world as of right now.. It was the biggest reason why i decided to come along.. I’ve been dreaming of going back there. It was a really good get away.. I love it here.. I love the rain and how life is so simple even when things get complicated.  Right now I am just going to better myself and do everything I can to enjoy the free time that I have left.. School is going to start in a couple of weeks so when that happens play time is over.  I promised myself that I will work the hardest that I have ever worked this comming school year.  No time for games and no time for anything that will get in the way of what I came here to do which is to succeed so i can make my family proud especially my nanay and lola.  I am smart.. I know I am and I say that in the most humblest possible way.. I have to be confident in order to succeed so yeah I am smart. I don’t like it sometimes here when some people get the wrong idea about me because I can’t express myself the way they do so they think i’m dumb or boring or lame or worst of all.. serious.. whatever I shouldn’t care anyways but I am not any of those things.. maybe sometimes but most of the time no I am not. I am just me..  I have my own way of expressing myself and making people laugh.. if you can’t understand or if you don’t get me well then fuck off.. the sense of humor is different here.. I’m still testing the waters.. but anyways what I am talking about?… I wanna go to Murcia today.. I think I better get ready.. I really want her to give me another chance because I really regret what I did "Nothing is worst than missing an oppurtunity that could’ve changed your life." .. I made the wrong choice and if I can go back I wouldn’t have let that chance just pass me by like I did.. but I can’t so what is there left for me to do now? Hopefully I can earn another chance.. She should have been the one I gave my love to.. I kinda knew it all along that’s why I secretly held on to her.  I can’t stop thinking about her.. I don’t think I really want to.  She understands me and she speaks her mind without hesitation (that’s what i’m looking for).. and I understand her and her attitude towards everything which is charming, strong, and smart and now I remember that the last song I wrote a long time ago was really for her.. I never posted it because like a lot of the songs I’ve written I feel that it’s unfinished. So I’m just going to post it now because i have had writer’s block for the past 8 months.  Maybe I’ll be able to write again after this.. hopefully one day I’ll be able to finish it with good reason.

"Lavender"

her calendar is out of date

silver spoons and masquerades

there’s a time and a place

to concentrate

she radiates

lavender

from January

to December

accumulate

my love for her

lavender

her lavender

she sets the sun down gently

she takes the fun out of being lonely

she’s the ocean

and i’m just sinking slowly

knowingly

her waves will save me

…About You…

Nickname: Joseand Jay "Jake"

Sex: Male

Eye Color: dark brown

Hair Color: dark brown

Height: 5′8

Favorite Color: blue, gray, green,

Screen Name: safetyandservice & setupthesystem

Your Car: far away

Your Hometown: Diamond Bar, CA =[

Your Crush's First Name: 735

Your Grade: im just going to say 3rd year because theres only 1 more day of 2nd year left.. hopefully i'll pass everything significantly.

Your Style: my own.  a little bit of this and a little bit of that

...Favorites...
Band: Thrice

Movie: There's a lot but umm right now all I can think about it.. The 5th Element

TV show: Grey's Anatomy

Song: "Beware, Criminal" by Incubus

Cigarette: I don't smoke anymore.. 2 years strong.

Pastime: Having fun, going places, enjoying life, and experiencing new things.

...Have You Ever...
Sat on your rooftop: Yeah I used to do that all the time.

Kissed someone in the rain: yeah

Danced in a public place: yeah hehe

Smiled for no reason: more than usually

Laughed so hard you cried: a couple of times

Peed your pants after age 8: i think so.. actually yeah hahah

Written a song: yeah plenty.. not recently though

Sang to someone for no reason: yeah

Performed on a stage: yeah that was one of the most memorable moments of my life. (i'm a boring guy) =]

Talked to someone you don’t know: yeah talking to strangers is good old fun.

Gone roller skating: yeah i miss that

Been in love: who knows.. maybe, maybe not..

A near death experience: yeah! on the freeway with my mom, my sister, and 2 cousins.. we spun out.. it was crrraaaazzzzzyy… it was raining so hard that day… scary stuff right there.. that was an eyeopener.

Sang in front of a large audience:
yeah hahahaha into ko sila

…Can You…
Write with both hands: yeah because i broke my right arm and i’m right handed so i had to learn how to write with my left hand because i was in a cast for like 2 months.

Whistle: i am not blessed with that ability

Blow a bubble: yeah im good at that

Roll your tongue: no i can’t ka tipla.

Cross your eyes: yeah haha naturally

Touch your tongue to your nose: almost…

Dance: fuck yeah.

Speak a different language: damn right

Impersonate someone: not really..

Cook anything: breakfast

…Are you…
Fighter: it depends what i’m fighting for.. i guess.. maybe not.. i’m a peaceful person

Smoker: nope

Drinker: not at all really.. used to back in the days.

Man eater: gross hahah hell no

Lover: oh yeah love is what i got.

War freak: nah that was way back when i was like 15 or 16.. i don’t look for trouble..

Heartbreaker: no i gave up on that… thats not cool

In love: right now? no.. not anymore..

Bossy: in some way i guess but not really..

Friendly: for sure.

…More…
What is your current mood?: disappointed but relieved

Does your crush like you back?: yeah she does… she does.

What makes you happy?: Family

Elaborate on your default photo: The picture was taken at Mall of Asia in Manila.. that was an awesome day.. saw fireworks and ate really good thai food… the thai iced tea was perfect.

Name one thing you do a lot: School.

Name someone with the same b-day as
you: some black girl named Mercedes back in 4th grade.. thats about it.. theres someone else but i forgot.

Are you comfortable with your height:
I wish I could be taller so I can dunk..

…Finish The Line…
If I were a dog … I would hump your leg haha

I wish … to have… more wisdom

So many people don’t know … what thrombocytopenia is (including me, i forgot)

I am … a man on a mission

My heart is … still beating. =)

x

o

x

o

I’m not studying.. not right now.. I just finished the season 3 finale of Grey’s Anatomy.. The episode good but it wasn’t a happy one.. It showed a lot of pain.. not physically (except for the guy that had an axe in his head that looked like it really hurt plus the frostbite).. but emotionally.. and you know what thats the pain that kinda hurts the most… but like they always say.. what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.. i like to think that is true.. because like everyone else i’ve felt pain but i know when the pain stops.. and the wounds heal… wisdom follows and you become a better person because of that pain.. it’s all about experiencing everything you that you dream about.. not matter the outcome.. just be thankful for experiencing a dream.. because it is the experience that makes you older.. not the time.

i’m just going to share a couple of qoutes or whatever from the episode…

"Nothing is worst than missing an oppurtunity that could’ve changed your life." -Dr. Addison Montgomery talking to Dr. Alex Karev telling him to take a chance with "Jane Doe".

"All we can do is keep breathing." (background music in the 2nd to the last scene when Dr. Christina Yang was breaking down after the wedding that never happened)

"Jack and the Beanstalk" the ilongo version dedicated to Andrei.. i always tell him this story to put him to sleep (works like a charm)

once upon a time.. gin sugo si Jack ni nanay ya e baligya kono ang ila baka ky la na gid sila kwarta.. hambal sang nanay ni Jack… "Jack kadto to bala sa Libertad bala Jack, dalon mo baka ta pangita ka to tawo nga ma bakal ha, sengkwenta mil e baligya mo ha.. sige na halong gid mayo." T nag lakat si Jack sa Libertad ma pangita to sya buyer.. la gid ya tawo gusto ma bakal.. ayawan sya mo.. pila na to sya ka horas.. ng abot na ang gabi la pa gyapon na baligya ni Jack.. tapos my nag historya nga buang sa iya.. lagba2 ang iya kuko kag iya buhok lagba2 man tapos damo damo kuto, baho baho pa bala haw.. grabi gid nga buang mo.. damak gid ya..  hambal sang buang.. "To pamati d bala to.. kita mo ni to o… udiputa MAGIK ni nga liso bala.. ma swerte swerte ka gid d ya.. baylo lang ta bla.. hatag mo imo baka sa akon ah.. tagaan ta ka tanan ko nga liso nga MAGIK.. tood e tanom mo lang ni bala tanawon mo kon ano ma tabo.." T ambot ngaa nag pati man si Jack.. gin baylo ya gid baka ni nanay ya para ma kwa ya ang MAGIK nga liso sang buang.. abot sya sa balay…. pakita ya ky nanay ya…. gin tampak gid sya ni nanay ya e… singit si nanay ya.. "GAGO GAGO! nano ka nga klase nga tawo man.. patchon mo na lang ko bala.. mas mayo pa.. udiputa ka.." T nag hambal man si Jack, "nanay MAGIK ni kono" mangkot si nanay ya.. "sino nag hambal haw?" nag sabat si Jack.. "Ang buang sa libertad".. nag singit naman nanay ni Jack.. "GAGO KA! BUANG KA MAN EH! LAKAT NA TO! GUB-ON KO GID ATCHURA MO KARON" tapos gin haboy ni nanay ni Jack ang liso sa sagwa bintana.. nag hibi gid si Jack todo todo asta na tulogan sya..

Nag bugtaw si Jack sa dason nga adlaw.. kita ya sa sagwa balay nila.. taas taas gid nga tanom! mas lapaw pa sa langit! grabi gid ya pirte gid ya ka taas na kibot si Jack.. nag saka si Jack e tanawon ya gid kon dn to asta ya.. astig na si Jack ya mo.. baw sige sya saka dugay dugay.. gamay gamay na gid ang balay nila.. mas taas pa sya sa ma nga eroplano.. sige lang sya saka ah asta na abot na sya sa punta.. na kita ya to isa nga DAKU DAKU GID nga balay mas daku pa sa SM City.. tingala sya.. "si sino da ga istar man? big time gid sya ba"… nag sulod si Jack.. grabi si Jack mo.. ma sulod gid sya ya.. kita ya DAKU DAKU nga chinilas.. tingala na man si Jack.. "ky sino na chinilas man.. daku daku tiil ya ba.. pirde gid pa si Shaquille Oneal." kita ya DAKU DAKU nga pulongkoan.. hambal ni Jack "Grabi nga pulongkoan ba.. si sino da ga punko man? daku daku gid buli ya e no? pirde pa si Ms. Joy Octaviano" tapos na kita ni Jack ang DAKU DAKU gid nga kama.. wala si Jack ng tingala kon si sino da ga tulog ky na kita ya ang GIGANTI nga ga tulog.. gahod gahod gid sya ma huragok.. na kulbaan si Jack mo.. tapos.. na kita ni Jack ang manok sang GIGANTI nga ga himo itlog nga GOLD! grabi gid kono.. hambal ni Jack.. "wow pirte ang abilidad sang manok ba.. gold gid iya itlog ba kuwaon ko na sya bala" tonto gid si Jack no.. t kwa ya gid to ya.. nag hipos hipos lang sya ma lakat ky basi ma bugtaw ang GIGANTI.. lapit na lang sya ma gwa sa pirtahan… tapos nag bugtaw na ang GIGANTI… abaw nag singit sya.. "ala diin na ang manok ko nga ga himo itlog nga GOLD?!" tapos na kita ya si Jack.. "IKAW GAGO! indi na imo manok! akon na manok! akon na GOLD! e tapakan ta ka bala! dn na chinilas ko man?" t nag dalagan si Jack tapos gina bit bit ya pa ang manok nga ga himo itlog nga GOLD!.. dasig gid si Jack ma giyo.. ala ala ala ara na ang GIGANTI na kita ya na ang iya chinilas… grabi si Jack ma naog.. dasig dasig gid ya… na una sya abot sa dalum nag singit sya "nanay dasiga dala di ang pina ka talum kag pina ka daku ta nga sundang utdon ta ni ang tanom o ky ara na ang GIGANTI ga naog na sya dasiga dasiga!".. t gin kwa to ni nanay ya e.. hatag ya ky jack.. grabi gid sya.. gin utod ya ang tanom.. 20 sekonds lang kinanlan ya ah.. baw t na dag dag ang GIGANTI e.. buka iya ulo… t patay. tapos wala na problema ky gin pakita ni Jack ang manok nga ga himo itlog nga GOLD ky nanay ya.. baw t… swerte swerte gid e.. sakto gid ang buang.

the end.